plank story – Page 3 – Personal Euphoria: Pilates & Fitness Classes in CT

Morning Person

I pretty much still look exactly this good when I wake up in the morning.

I miss being a morning person. Until turning thirty, I’d bound out of bed singing, “Oh, what a beautiful morning. Oh, what a beautiful day!” It would be animated—arms reaching up and everything. That’s no exaggeration. I’ve done that. When I wasn’t singing, I’d wake up talking. Matt, my boyfriend, used to call me Chatty Cathy. When a crack of light creeped through the curtain, I’d just start: “I like the color purple. Do you like the color purple? What do you want to do today? Did you see…?” I’d open the curtains with a spunk and vivacity only exhibited in musical theater. As I write that down, I realize Matt really should have left me by now. He likes to sleep in and he moans every time actors break into song.

Sadly, I’m not the morning person I used to be, and it’s made me realize that the non-morning people in my life—Matt, my mom, and my best friend since childhood, Julie—must all really love me. They are not naturally morning people. And now, if I […]

Morning PersonMaggie Downie2018-02-14T16:35:44-05:00

Plank Story: Underwear Expert

This is not my first plank story about underwear. I am not an underwear expert by any means, as you are about to learn. We have very close friends who live on a street with the name Dusty Bottom Lane. They once bought Matt a pair of Duluth underwear—definitely the best underwear in the world. (I don’t sell for them, I just know Matt speaks very highly of them.) One day Matt had to climb up into the rafters of our house to hang a curtain. He went up wearing only in his undies. He came down, wearing his Duluth boxers and a layer of dust all over his bottom. I laughed and suggested that: “We have to text a picture of your dusty bottom in the underwear they gave you.” Without missing a beat Matt responded: “We are not sending anyone a picture.” Fair enough. I get that.

So instead I just sent a text: Matt’s bottom is dusty from climbing up in the rafters in his Duluth undies. He won’t let me send you a pic so neither can you see the underwear you got him or his actual dusty bottom. SEND

Then I immediately started repeating, “Oh, […]

Plank Story: Underwear ExpertMaggie Downie2018-02-14T16:54:53-05:00

Plank Story: You’re Weird

Seriously, do I seem weird to you?

It was Christmas Eve, and I don’t recall what warranted this response, but my friend’s seven-year-old daughter said to me, “You’re weird.” I chuckled and told her, “Well, I take that as a compliment.”

“Well, it’s not,” she retorted. I laughed harder, after which, we had a brief, light conversation about how it’s good to be different. Later that night, our families were exchanging presents. This young friend’s school sells gifts so that kids can buy presents at school for their families. She had picked out various thoughtful gifts for everyone in the room—hand soap for her aunt, crosswords for Matt’s dad, a candle for Matt’s mom, a flashlight you can attached to your work badge for Matt. When it was my turn […]

Plank Story: You’re WeirdMaggie Downie2018-02-14T17:43:58-05:00

Plank Story: Boxing Ezzard Charles

Robert “Red” Hale on the left.

Both my grandfathers fought in the South Pacific during WWII. Of all the stories my grandfather’s shared with me, this is one of my favorites:

Red Hale in the South Pacific

Sometimes during the liberty the sailors would start a pick-up ballgame or set up a boxing ring. While serving in the South Pacific, my grandfather at 5’9″ had just entered a make-shift boxing ring. He had the gloves on when a monster of a man stepped in at six-feet, 200-pounds. My grandfather and his twenty-nine inch waist turned to the ref, eyes wide and hollered, “Take the gloves off! Take the gloves off!”

But the larger man said, “Don’t worry, kid. I’ll go easy on you.”

Plank Story: Boxing Ezzard CharlesMaggie Downie2019-06-17T17:47:32-04:00

Plank Story: The Critters at My Door

Matt was traveling for work. I was home alone after dark sitting in the living room when I heard a noise. A noise I can’t quite describe, but it is the sound of horror films—a metallic scratching and thudding. My heart jumped to my throat because I knew I was going to die. This was definitely the sound from the movies right before someone gets it, and I was hearing it in real life. Who would do this to torture me? Had I locked all the doors? I was pretty sure I had.

I followed the noise, not knowing whether that was the right move. I tiptoed through the house in a terror trance. The noise pulled me through the kitchen […]

Plank Story: The Critters at My DoorMaggie Downie2018-01-13T15:48:05-05:00