There are lots of people, especially women (and women who have had babies), who struggle to engage their pelvic floor. It can be hard to find and it’s not a muscle we’re taught about in school like our abs or biceps.

The muscles that make up your kegel (or pelvic floor) muscles connect to the base of your pelvis. They tie the tailbone, the public bone, the sits bones (those protruding bumps your feel in your buttocks when you sit down) together.

This is one of the best exercises I have found to start to feel and be able to understand where the pelvic floor is located. And it’s really easy to try.


Sit in a chair with your feet hip distance apart.
Stand up slowly.
Sit down slowly.

As you stand up, especially at the last moment when you are finally fully erect, notice how your sits bones come closer together. As you sit and your buttocks moves closer to the chair notice how they spread. It’s not a huge range of motion. If you can’t feel the difference in your body start by touching your sits bones with your hands and see if that doesn’t help.

Once you start to get the idea that your pelvic floor aids in pulling these two points together, you will understand a big part of the location–just don’t forget that it also runs the pubic bone. This exercise doesn’t really help you feel that aspect.

As you start to feel the muscle try to pull the sits bones closer together when you stand up. Make sure you aren’t squeezing your buttocks. (Putting your hands on your butt to make sure it’s relaxed might help you do this correctly.) Then when you sit down try to spread the sits bones further. Again, we aren’t talking a matter of inches here. In the beginning it may feel like you are just visualizing the movement and nothing is really happening, but keep practicing and playing with it for a while. Try it again tomorrow or the day after.

Like I said, of all the exercises I’ve been given, seen or read about I have found this one is one of the three to five most helpful in understand that confusing, awkward kegel.