Mystic Lantern Light Tours

The Mystic Lantern Light Tours

When I was in high school and college I used to perform in the Mystic Lantern Light Tours.  They are what they sound like: tours, led by lantern light.  Walking along the dirt streets at the seaport is like stepping back in time. A period-dressed guide takes a group of people from historic home-to-home-to-ship-to-pub throughout the seaport and in each location a scene is acted out by a group of actors.  It’s a walk through a restored village of sea captains and merchants before women wore pants and planes flew overhead. 

One year when I was a tour guide, Matt, my boyfriend, came on my tour.  A few scenes into the tour, I escorted my group into the pharmacy.  In the scene, as we entered, one of the actors was supposed to point out that I was standing under the mistletoe.  My character was meant to blush and move away, never insinuating to desire a kiss as a good colonial lady.  But the night Matt attended, he improvised […]

Mystic Lantern Light Tours2018-11-21T11:14:46-04:00

Plank Story: Milk a cow

It was suggested to me that this is the best angle to photograph milking a cow.

Finally!!!  I milked a cow.  For years I’ve wanted to milk a cow, which is a challenging task to complete in Connecticut.  If a farm sells their milk, they are not allowed to let uncertified hands touch their cow’s udders.  Unless you have a friend with a cow, it’s unlikely you’ll be milking a cow in this state.

That is until Matt discovered Local Farm in Cornwall, Connecticut.  Debra Tyler, the owner for Local Farm sets up a great day for groups.  You milk a cow and within an hour you have made butter, cheese and have prepared yogurt and sour cream that will be ready the next day.  Within two hours, you have made ice cream.  You enjoy all the food with the others at the workshop pot luck style.  It’s a wonderful way to spend three hours.

In Awe

I was amazed all day.  I had no idea how much food a single milking produced.  It’s truly unbelievable how much food one cow creates.  Using only our small sample of people as a gauge, I […]

Plank Story: Milk a cow2018-11-27T07:39:02-04:00

That’s Not A Word

Me & Matt

I’ve been with Matt for nearly 17 years and he never commented on this until today and neither has anyone else I’ve spoken to.  I mentioned to him that something stressing me out was giving me “agina.”  To which he finally replied, “That’s not a word.”

“Yes, it is,” I insisted.

“Nope, it’s agita.”

After a brief debate we searched for the answer online and the Google Gods proclaimed that agita is in fact a word for heartburn while agina is a word for nothing, unless I mean angina, which I don’t.  But I insisted: “Well, that’s not what I mean.  I don’t have heartburn.  This is giving me agina: an overall feeling of anxiousness.  It must be Italian.”

While not true, this seemed a plausible answer as my Italian-American family does use a number of random Italian words.  “Moosha moosh” describes when you just don’t feel great.  You are still willing to eat, but then you’ll want to lie down.  We say “Madone” which is the Italian swearword I know best.  […]

That’s Not A Word2018-08-15T15:05:07-04:00

Plank Story: Do You Fart in Your Sleep?

My younger sister, stepmom, and I were flying to Dallas to visit my brother and sister-in-law and attend a baby shower for the first grandchild in my family.  We’d all be sharing a hotel room, so we discussed who would be sharing a bed in a room with two queen mattresses.

Cold at night, even in a Texas climate, my stepmom sleeps in many layers, including a cap.  But that doesn’t hinder your fellow sleepers.  She admitted to snoring, but a good snore you can hear from either bed.

My little sister basically sleeps like a rock, so she was the general winner in the group—the one everyone would want to sleep with.  However, though only I remember this, when we were little we’d sometimes sleep together and she would wake up covered in vomit, which I found repulsive.  She claimed she no longer vomited in her sleep and I tend to believe her.

It was determined I was the worst sleeping partner.  Sometimes while falling asleep, I twitch which can be off-putting to people.  I was told by my best friend on a cross country camping trip that I snuggle.  I’m a light […]

Plank Story: Do You Fart in Your Sleep?2018-05-04T11:15:37-04:00

Plank Story: Moby Bring Sally Up

Matt will be very active with me.  He will hike, kayak, and a can be convinced to run once in a very rare while or if he’s worried I’m running somewhere unsafe.  While he likes movement, he loathes exercise.  Pilates would be great for him, but he’ll nearly never do it.  But I figured out his Achilles heel—the secret that will get Matt down on the mat. The trick involves Moby Bring Sally Up.

Last night I was inspired to sing to him, “Why do birds suddenly appear every time you are near? Just like me, they long to be, close to you.”  Those were the only words I remembered, so I sang them on repeat.  His face shifted to this look of angsty compassion.  His cringing brow declared, “I love you, but the sound coming out of your voice is causing intense pain,”  He wouldln’t admit it, but his face, and the bleeding ears, couldn’t hide the reality.  At first I thought he might just not like the Carpenters.  But then I realized it was me.  I stopped singing and asked if he wanted to try this plank challenge I’d heard […]

Plank Story: Moby Bring Sally Up2018-05-23T15:48:32-04:00